I can count that on my fingers!

Today marks the sixth week of school for me up at SUU. That means that there are only ten more weeks left! You don't know how happy that makes me. I can do anything ten times, I can count that on my fingers! I know that I am supposed to be enjoying my journey while I am here, and I really am trying to do that. But sometimes it just seems so endless, I just keep having to leave my family and it makes me so sad. But ten weeks? Now that is manageable! Today I texted my sister Kristi, these were my exact words: "Only ten more weeks of school! Yes! You can count that on your fingers! We can totally make it!" If that's not encouraging to someone struggling through a really hard dental hygiene program, or some little baby that can't handle being away from her family, then I don't know what is. Also, who thinks it's symbolic that the only picture I could find on google of someone putting up ten fingers is of Nelson Mandela? I don't know the whole story, but I know that he went to jail for something like fifty years somewhere in Africa for speaking his mind about what was right. If he can sit in a jail cell for fifty years being completely innocent, then I can certainly handle ten more weeks at college! Ah wow the symbolism!

ps- who thinks that its sad that i learned that story about Nelson Mandela on America's Next Top Model? Ha at least I heard it somewhere, I knew that show was good for something!

HIKE!!!!

Yes, it actually happened....I, ME, the girliest whiniest non nature, runner, walker, physicaler girl ever went on a hike! For family home evening!! Go ahead...let out that squeal of surprise, but dont worry I am still the same, not hike loving person! It was for family home evening.....ratio four boys to fourty girls..not like Im looking for a boy, but seriously? we were hiking! hiking for a church activity should equal boys! What if I had fallen and broken my leg? I would need a group of manly good looking men to carry me down! But anyway..my butt is soar now, but it was totally worth it. It was a beautiful view and I actually met some cool girls!

Roommates!!

Leila, Mariah, and the corner of my face...in the kitchen. Leila is one of my roommate, Mariah is one of Alex's best friends...she is at our house a lot..i would pretty much consider her one of my roommates! Even though she doesn't technically live there.

Dance Party! Alex busting out some mad moves at our strobe light dance party in the living room!

Alex and Holly, another one of our not technically roommates that may as well be..jammin!

Me and Talysha...our moves aren't quite as awesome as the rest of the crazy girls..but we were jamming on the inside!

My roommates Leila, Talysha, and Alex are pretty much my only friends here in the crazy land of Cedar City..and Alex's friends. This is a shining example of us being weird...strobe light dance party at eight o'clock on a Monday night..just us..no boys! But hey, that is how I do college alright! We also made some amazing mac and cheese that night...college at its finest! I think I can most definitely handle this for another three months.
p.s.-mom just because I have fun with my roommates does not mean that I miss you any less or that I have changed my mind about coming back to Dixie. Its still really hard..especially when I'm alone. But don't worry I am actually having fun and enjoying the time that I have!

Sweaty Football Pic!

Yes, I finally got it, and I was very excited! I went to the football game all by myself..ha sat by Eric's parents, who are really nice to me always, but I still feel a tiny bit nervous around... and they won so I got my sweaty football hug and pic...very important things for a young girl. And yes I know I'm actually in college and shouldn't care about high school football games, but I do! So successful weekend, I got to hang out with people I know and my family actually got home before I left! And I only had one mini-breakdown....and I had someone to comfort me...so that was awesome! Woo...positive thoughts and I can get through another week!

wow i'm a mess

Weird picture choice, I know. But this is what I miss the most!

College is a very new experience for me. It makes me feel very little. It makes me really want to go home and live in my parents basement for the rest of my life. It makes me want a hug from my mommy. It makes me realize how many friends I have- that would be zero....in Cedar. It makes me realize how socially awkward I am. It makes me feel so dumb for being so scared. It makes me realize how lucky I have been my entire life. It makes me so glad that I have the best family ever. It makes me so happy that my sisters are my best friends and they already know me, so I don't have to tell them what my major is, or why i'm crying. It makes me so grateful for the gospel, and the peace that the Lord has really been trying to put into my heart...i tend to push it away with my worry panic attacks. It makes me think about all of the times I have been a complete brat to my mom, and how much i wish she were here right now. It makes me wish that I wouldn't have thought I was too good for Dixie State. It makes me cry....a lot. A lot of crying...and my roommate just looks at me and uncomfortably walks out of the room. I don't blame her. I wouldn't want to be in the same room with a crazy pants that cries twenty four seven cause she doesn't know how to make friends and she just wants her mommy. But I do. And I don't know how to fix it...my cheeks are actually getting raw from all of the tear wiping. Its like everything i've ever known has just disappeared. And I know that my family is still there and still loves me and they always will. But that doesn't make it any easier for me to walk around campus by myself and not know anyone. Its a very strange feeling. I'm a very strange person though so I guess it works. Pretty much what I'm saying is that I really wish that I could be permanently seventeen. At my house with my family, not having to work, or try to make friends, just not being alone. Watching an episode of Bones with my dad that we've both seen fourteen times but I still forget who the killer is. Reruns just aren't the same when you're alone.

Josher! It's your Birthday!

Ha just so you all know, I don't actually call him Josher. That is all my Dad. I usually go for a Joshy or a Joshy Poshy combo!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOSH! I love you! You are the nicest most wonderful boy in the world! I hope you have the best mid twenties birthday party in the world!

Now that looks nice! Ha such great balloon blowing skills! I love you!!!!!!
Josh have the best birthday in Miami! I can't believe you are going to Florida without me! What happened to me being in your suitcase? Haha that would have been nice! You better have some freaking fun at the beach for me! Happy B Day!

Happy Birthday My Most Wonderful Mother!!!

My mom is the most amazing woman in the world! I can only hope that someday I will be half the mom, grandma, wife, and friend that she is! She is the most patient, kind, and loving person ever! I don't know what I would do without her!!!

I have no idea where we are right here, but we all look decent and that doesn't happen very often in pictures! I love my Mommy! Happy Birthday!

Yesterday we celebrated my mommy's 50th birthday! Holy Cow! Can you believe my tiny beautiful little mom is 50! It blows my mind! Im so happy I got to go down and chill with everyone! The party was amazingly decorated, thanks to Emily of course, and Taisha made the most beautiful cake ever! It was a masterpiece! And of course no one could forget Kristi's pink salad that was black! I hope that my mom enjoyed her party as much as I did! I love her so much and I hope she had the best 50th birthday party in the whole wide world! I love you mommy!

my nephew is FIVE??!!!

Mini Mike??
Brooks is a hard child to explain with simple words...so i thought that I would give you a picture book of some of his greatest moments through his five years of life!!!

cutest little baby ever!! our family was very excited to welcome the first little grandbaby and we were definitely not let down!.....and you should all appreciate the fact that i actually blogged a picture of my blondeness....only for Brooks!

love the hair...very intensely playing on that weird little bike thing...

one word: jamming! this little man can liven up any party or event with his mad dance skills...just ask him to do Michael Jackson

hiiiii yaaa! yes that is a karate noise...probably the exact one that came from Brooks' mouth at this very moment in time! mad skill...with the kicking!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BROOKSIE!!!!! I FREAKIN LOVE YOU!!!!
you are an amazing little ball of energy and craziness and i think that your first five years of life have been pretty darn successful!!!

COLLEGE!!!!

My awesome desk with my funny pictures and inspirational quotes...my side of the room is very bland compared to my roommates rainbowness...ha but its okay i like my side just fine!

My adorable bed that I have not fallen off of yet! ha but i do kick my window occasionally..usually its on accident...sometimes its cause im super bugged with the volleyball players screaming outside my window at one in the morning!

My roommie Talysha...slightly caught off guard by my picture taking early in the morning

The first day of school!!!!!!!

So..I have made it a week and a half in college....im still not exactly sure what im doing here...but its getting a little bit easier being away from my family. I actually consumed vegetables and meat yesterday...so that is better than my strictly sandwiches and instant pasta diet that I had the first week of school. I actually have a couple friends in my math class...mostly because they laugh at my stupid comments because I am the dumb kid! But whatever...I will take what I can get! Im still not sure why I decided I wanted to live away from home...and I might change my mind come next fall and be back in the STG at least for a couple more years! Ha I guess we will just have to wait and see! I dont cry as much as I used to...which is good...im sure my mom will be proud! For now I just look forward to weekends and the occasional weekday birthday party so I can come home and see my family!!!